Tips for Handling Adversity
Updated: Apr 2
This morning I did Live coaching in my Facebook Monthly Coaching Circle group about how to get through adversity and I thought I'd share a few tips with you as well. Hopefully, you are NOT facing any setbacks or obstacles right now, but in case you are these might help.
I've certainly faced my share of all the above on my quest to create my dream life and I've learned from each one. Though it's never easy to go through difficult times, there are ways you can make it easier and less of a setback, and over time, you can make them less frequent as well by learning from the past and making new decisions moving forward.
Here are a few of my "tricks" on how to move through the hard times as quickly as possible.
How to positively handle adversity:
Get some perspective. This is the first thing I try to do when I'm really going through a tough time or have just experienced a setback. I ask myself: "Is this gonna kill me? Can I survive it? Will I even remember facing it a year from now?" These questions help me remember that all adversity is temporary, and keeps me from making permanent decisions based on a temporary setback.
How badly do I want it? This is a great time to get re-focused on why I'm doing it in the first place. What is my dream? Why does it matter? Why do I want it? What will it feel like when I'm living it? All those questions get me back on track and help me start focusing on what I want, instead of dwelling on the current situation. Get that end-vision CLEAR!
Take accountability. This is a great time to ask yourself some tough questions, like "Did I manifest this?" What was I doing, thinking and saying previously that could have brought this into my life?" "What actions did I take, or choices did I make that got me to this point?" This is hard to do I know, but trust me it will help you steer clear of playing the victim, which is never productive.
What's the lesson? I always use tough times to search for the lesson. What is this experience trying to teach me? What is it preparing me for? What should I be learning now, so that I can be more prepared for my next breakthrough? I've learned that almost always, the tough times are getting us ready for our next level of success.
Do one small thing. Sometimes when we've faced a tough disappointment it's hard to "get back on the horse." We want to just quit, and so we stop doing the things we know we must do to reach our goals. Fight this by doing just one small thing each day for a few days. The last thing you want is momentum to come to a halt and you need the energy to shift back in your favor, so keep moving forward, one small step at a time.
The more you learn from these situations the better you will be at navigating and avoiding them in the future. Of course, we can't control everything in life, and these moments are not entirely avoidable, that's just life, BUT we do have far more control over them then we may believe.
I believe that our thoughts predict our words, and our words predict our actions and those actions deliver results, so... if you don't like your results, or if you've repeated a pattern that gives you outcomes you dislike, it's time to change the root cause.
Negative thoughts produce negative outcomes. Thoughts of doubt and fear produce the feared result. Thoughts of lack, manifest more lack. Thoughts of unworthiness produce low self-confidence and self-sabotaging behavior.
Do an inventory of your thoughts the past year or two and ask yourself, is what I'm going through related to what I've been thinking? If the answer is yes, then you know where to begin to start getting change!
If you need help learning how to change your thoughts...