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The Lost Art of Communication: The Do's and Don't of Communicating
This brief coaching episode is all about the lost art of communication! I'm sharing my Do's and Don't when it comes to communication, why? Because humans have forgotten how to communicate with each other and it annoys the shit out of me! And I feel like we have a responsibility to show up as humans in our communication even though AI would like to make us lazy and unthinking robots and do it all for us!
I talk about texting, social media, listening skills, why you should be a "responder," how AI can help and hurt us, and more.
The Do's
Do ask questions -Be curious!
Do respond to people using YOUR WORDS!
Acknowledge what the person said to let them know you heard them
Show/express empathy
Be an "opener" and say things like "Tell me more," or "What do you mean?" or "Can you explain that or give me an example?" All of those open up the conversation and help you get to know someone better.
Do use preface statements to become a better communicator and listener: things like, "This is what I'm thinking...." or "This is how I feel about x" or "here's what I need..." And then ALWAYS follow up with a question that lets them respond and tell you what they are thinking, how they feel and what they need etc.
The Don'ts
Don't be a "closer!" Don't just respond with an answer to the question (if a person is trying to get to know you for example), after you answer it, volley the question back by asking, "What about you?" Make sure your responses aren't closing down the conversation.
Don't make all communication about you!
Don't ignore!! Is there anything more universally rude than this? BE A HUMAN! If someone took the time to reach out, RESPOND.
Don't rely on emojis and reaction responses to be your communication, USE YOUR WORDS! Nothing worse than taking the time to use your words and have them be met with a "like" or a "heart."
Don't just be the "responder." Are other people the ones doing all the work to keep your connection, relationship or friendship alive? If you're only responding, then that means you're not holding up your end of the relationship.
Don't demand, ask.
So, if you've become a little lazy in your communication maybe this will be a good reminder, or send it to someone you know, or to your teens... I just hope this helps us get back to some of the basic ways of connecting with each other that is respectful, empathetic, and genuine.
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Sarah Centrella is a #1 best-selling author of several self-help books, a motivational keynote speaker, master life coach, Founder of VIVIAMO and podcast host.